Monday, June 28, 2010

The Bachelorette 6/28

Let’s call this one, “The Phone Call.”

Chris Harrison’s face is tragic. Ali’s face when she heard the news is almost authentic. And the sad camera work on the other end of the phone call set this up as a great episode. Justin’s girlfriend, Jessica looks exactly like you wish she would. But there’s a twist, she is one of TWO girlfriends Justin left at home. Shocked? No. Entertained? Absolutely. And we’ve only seen the first segment. Get yourselves ready, folks.

“I’m just pissed.”
-Couldn’t have said it better myself, Ali.

Chris Harrison at his finest: “Just be strong and let him have it.”

The guys come together – just look at Frank. He’s shell-shocked. Ty had a smug smile. Justin feigns disgust and walks out, and Ali goes after him. This couldn’t get any better. He’s going to great heights (literally) to get off camera. Now you want to see Ali off camera? Justin kind of melted my heart when he was speaking Portuguese in the first episode. Not my best moment of judgment. He will have some questions to answer in “After the Final Rose.” This typecast never quite gets old…

TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES! Our Time Warner timed out and we jump from Ali cursing at Justin to Frank running up behind Ali and their 1-on-1 date. Sadness… What did I miss?

Frank highlight: “I feel like I’m in a movie right now.” Well, you are in a 2-hour TV show. What’s the difference?

Frank is legitimately falling for Ali and she is scared that Frank could break her heart… I think it’s far more likely she could break his heart. He’s such a female about this process. I feel like he’s vulnerable.

What? No cocktail party? That seems to happen about once a season. Ali knows what she wants to do; the guys have no idea. They are visibly stressed! Drama at it’s finest.

They really tried to play up Kirk’s anxiety of going home tonight, but I wasn’t buying it. That said, Kirk’s final look was almost threatening. He did not like being the last name called. Craig was legit dumbfounded and it’s always hard to see a grown, respectable man like that. Probably because as an adult woman I don’t let myself get anywhere vulnerable like that. Final six and crying? That’s pretty early for the dudes.

All I have to say is my final four is in tact. Ty goes away next week and call me a prophetess. Or don’t, but that’s pretty good.

HOLY SCENES!! If I wasn’t hooked on this season, and this blog clearly suggests that fact, the scenes for the rest of the season opened my eyes right up. So Frank does break Ali’s heart. This is intoxicating. I can’t get enough.

Dissecting the scenes:

Portugal:
Roberto? check.
Chris? Check
Kirk? Check
Ty? Check.
Frank? Check.

Hometown:
Frank
Roberto

Tahiti:
Roberto
Ty
Frank

Hold on kids, this is going to be "The Most Dramatic Finale Ever!"

Saturday, June 26, 2010

The pain of fandom...

It hurts. It guts. It deflates. It paralyzes.

The thing about being a fan is you remain hopeful. You try to stay optimistic. But realism and optimism aren’t always aligned. And incongruity breeds pain.

Monday, June 21, 2010

a lil bit of Bachelorette live-blogging

Hello family, and anyone else who happens to stumble across my blog,

I live far away from my Bachelor and Bachelorette-watching family. This travesty is somewhat mitigated by our family website that receives a dramatic spike in participation (almost as dramatic as the most dramatic rose ceremony ever) about every Monday after 10 p.m. no matter the time zone. Our love of The Bachelor saga knows no age, no gender, no geography. We are sprawled across this great nation and love to talk about the Bachelor. Our belief in this institution for conversation fodder is topped only by Chris Harrison’s sincere belief in this institution as a marriage starter.

Before I dive into my thoughts of tonight’s episode, I just want to get one thing out there, I called the Final Four after the first episode and I stand by my choices… Chris L., Roberto, Kirk, Frank.

Preface: I just want Kasey to know that my heart is guarded and protected. On that note, I will be doing a running “heart tracker” and trying to count how many times Kasey says heart. I claim no accuracy; I only claim effort.

Heart tracker: 111111111111111111111

These are actual thoughts, while actually watching an actual episode of actual television. I feel like that needed to be clarified!

And to start things off we are heading to Iceland. Ideal. Showing off these hard economic times, ABC puts these guys in coach, back row, middle seat. Spare no expense.

And right away we have a poem-writing contest for a 1-on-1 date. These have always been a crowd pleaser. I can’t help but wonder, what will Kasey write? I think it goes something like this:

Oh my love, Ali where do I start?
How about talking about guarding and protecting your heart.


Wait, how do I say "guard and protect your heart" in Icelandic?

Not surprisingly, the highlight of Kasey's poem was Chris L’s impersonation. I’m 100% confident he won’t be getting that 1-on-1 date.

Fact… Chris N. has a voice beyond “Absolutely.” Who knew? As for the poem? It hurt. 3 months later and thousands of miles away I wanted to save him from himself…

Oh, good move by Kirk getting close to Ali. Did no one learn from Roberto last time? (I promise I said that before Ali did… two names think alike, I guess!)

Thanks to his smooth moves, Kirk gets the 1-on-1 date with Ali and gets the chance to tell his sob story. When hearing Kirk talk about his illness, I feel like I’m watching an episode of “House.” Duh, it always comes back to the molds. Not exactly what I was expecting with the teaser of his fear of sharing his past, but a near-death story was not what I anticipated. Shocking? That said, these two are legitimately cute.

The episode stealers today were Kasey and Justin. My favorite moments?

Kasey: “I’m not just trying to stick around, I’m trying to be the man of her dreams.”

Justin: “One small step for Justin, one giant leap for Rated R”

Favorite Ali moment of the night, while in Iceland: “Now we get to go to a place that the guys have never seen before.”
-Ya, Iceland.

Brooding Frank. Emotionally disastrous, brooding Frank. I’m not a fan of that situation. I am, however, a fan of Ali calling Frank out and asking him to be less of a female on their group dates. Step up buddy.

I'm really taking advantage of this last commercial break before the 2-on-1 date. Deep breaths – this will be painful. The previous two 2-on-1 dates (Jillian and Jake's seasons) sent home both dates, I’m hoping this trend continues!

Sadly I was wrong, but the image of Justin and Ali leaving Kasey alone on this mountain is priceless.

And Ali cuts Chris N. and all’s right in the world. Next week SPOILER ALERT, Justin’s girlfriend at home is exposed and Ali shows some fire in her. Love the drama. I’m 14 seasons strong in this…

You heard it here first.

Saturday, June 19, 2010

a lil bit of scripture study

I'm doing my favorite thing in the whole world. On the joy-inducing scale, it surpasses speaking Portuguese, playing, watching or coaching soccer and being in Brazil. I'm studying the scriptures preparing to teach.

For 19 months this was a daily ritual. For 19 months I woke up every morning with the singular purpose to study the scriptures with the hope in God and faith in his inspiration that I might be prepared to teach his children effectively, recall information quickly and discern spiritual needs accurately (not necessarily in that order).

I'm now studying the story of Saul and David in the Old Testament, hoping to sense what God wants his children to learn, those children who will be attending my Sunday School class tomorrow and this child, who will be teaching the Sunday School class.

And I am joyful.